Before a first date, it’s normal to alternate between feelings of excitement at finally getting to know your potential new partner and the fear that you will do something wrong or that they won’t live up to your expectations. And unfortunately, there are in fact a few things that can go wrong on a first date. We reveal which no-go areas to avoid in future for your first date and which tips to bear in mind to make sure you get a second date.
10 tips for your first date – what to avoid
- No-one likes playing twenty questions
It’s completely normal to want to find out as much as possible about your date when you meet them for the first time. And that’s no bad thing – after all, you do need to know who you might be starting a relationship with. But unfortunately, an intense interrogation won’t go down well at all on a first date. There are some questions which have absolutely no place on a first date – questions such as whether your date has ever been unfaithful, whether they have any debts and how much they earn. These are things you’ll find out soon enough, and your date definitely won’t like these sorts of questions. Focus instead on questions that are a little more subtle, like what hobbies your date has and which restaurants they like to eat in. Our first date tip for you? Have a think beforehand about what questions you want to ask your date. That way you’ll never run out of things to talk about.
- Not having your own opinion
It’s natural to want your date to like you on your first date. But someone who just agrees with everything and doesn’t seem to have their own opinion is far from interesting. Defend your opinion and be honest about what you think. Otherwise you won’t be able to keep it up easily if you end up in a relationship. Be yourself and impress your date with your true character.
- Don’t overdo it
The first impression is often the most important, so feel free to make yourself look nice so you feel good. But don’t go over the top. Above all, remember that your date has already met you before. If they barely recognise you on the first date, it could backfire. So, as we’ve already said, just be yourself.
- Don’t expect too much
If you go into something with high expectations, things will often go belly-up – which will only leave you really disappointed when things don’t go as expected. If your expectations are high then you’ll be less relaxed, which won’t usually make a good impression on your date. That’s why it’s better not to think too much about it before your first date. Take a relaxed approach and you’ll see how well it can go 😊
- Choosing the wrong location
When you’re thinking about where to meet for your first date, it’s best to choose a restaurant or bar where you’re unlikely to meet a lot of people you know. It’s far from ideal when someone different comes up to your table every few minutes, leaving you wondering how to introduce your date – especially when you’re just getting to know each other. So, it’s best to choose a place where the two of you can get to know each other undisturbed.
- First date ideas – nothing too unusual please
A traditional first date involves going out for a meal, going to a bar and going to the cinema. Seeing a film means you’ll definitely have something to talk about, for example. But there are also some things you may be better off avoiding for your first date: a moonlit stroll, a canoeing trip or a visit to an exotic restaurant – after all, you don’t know your date well enough yet to know whether these sorts of activities will go down well. Our first date tip? You’re best off sticking to something traditional for the first date. You can always do something a bit different on the second and third date 😉
- The matter of the bill
Leaving the woman to pay the bill on her own is a definite no-no. It always used to be the case that the man would pay the bill on the first date. It was simply the done thing. These days, however, many women insist on equality and therefore like to pay themselves, too. If a man wants to pay, the best thing to do is to ask the woman if she is happy for him to get the bill. Then, if she’d rather share the bill, she can say so. This is also the right approach for same-sex dates. If one person wants to get the bill, they should ask their date if that’s OK.
- Being too pushy
OK, so you go on a date to find out if you’re a good match and want to start a relationship. And at some point, sex inevitably comes into the picture. But for many people, jumping straight to close physical contact is a big no-go – especially on a first date. Putting a hand on your date’s leg or reaching for their hand can even be too much. So, it’s best to take things slowly. And if things work out, there will be plenty of time for you to get intimate with each other 😉
- Having too much alcohol
It’s perfectly acceptable to have a cocktail, a glass of bubbly or even a beer on a first date. Especially since a lot of people are a bit more relaxed after a little alcohol. But drink too much and it will definitely backfire and scare your date off. So, take it easy with the alcohol!
- Deception
The point of a date is to get to know the other person and find out if they’re right for you. But if you tell lies on your first date, you run the risk of real disappointment. Our last tip for your first date, then? Just be honest from the beginning. And revealing a few little weaknesses can even make you very likeable 😊
Bear these first date tips in mind and you should be able to avoid the most common pitfalls. And things are bound to work out on your second date, too – have fun 😉